Florida has a wild reputation, and it just hit a new peak. A 70-year-old retiree named Patrick Francis Mitchell made headlines after allegedly urinating on more than $10,000 worth of food inside a Sam’s Club in Lady Lake, and then calmly hung around like nothing happened.
It all went down at around 9:49 a.m. on May 30, when Mitchell allegedly strolled into the Florida store, walked up to pallets stacked with Vienna sausage and Spam, and proceeded to relieve himself right in the aisle. According to the police affidavit, surveillance video shows him “placing both hands in front of him below the belt line, and standing there for several seconds” in a way that, let’s face it, leaves little to the imagination.
After the alleged shave session, he didn’t run. Instead, he wandered over to the patio furniture display, sat down for a full ten minutes, then browsed and paid for his groceries like everything was totally normal, per People Magazine.
Florida Man Pees On More Than $10K Worth Of Food At Sam’s Club
The fallout was expensive. Store managers discovered urine on two pallets containing 188 cans of Vienna sausage and 345 cans of Spam. Yuck, right? Everything had to be tossed, resulting in a staggering loss of $10,584.84 worth of inventory.
Mitchell was arrested June 4 and charged with criminal mischief, which becomes a felony when damages exceed $1,000, and disorderly conduct. His first court appearance on June 10 resulted in a not-guilty plea. He’s free on $3,000 bond, and his next hearing is set for June 30.
It wasn’t just employees who saw it. A woman at the store snapped pics of the event on her phone and showed them to the staff. As for Mitchell, he lived up to Florida’s “anything-goes” stereotype: peeing in the middle of a grocery store and then hanging out like nothing happened.
This isn’t a prank or a publicity stunt. According to police records, it was an actual (and disgusting) criminal act. With court dates approaching, you can bet a lawyer is already prepping a game plan. Meanwhile, the internet is buzzing, local shoppers are disgusted, and Sam’s Club managers are counting their losses, more than $10K worth.
“America’s basement strikes again,” one person commented.
“WTF is wrong with people in Florida?” asked another.
“Gross! Lock him up,” said a third.
If you’re hitting up Sam’s Club anytime soon, especially in Florida, don’t forget the lock on your cart — and maybe bring hazmat gloves for the canned meat aisle.
Kendra Quinn 
Kenna Raye 
Nina Franklin 
